Given that I am taking the blood thinning drug, Rivoroxaban, and the fact that I broke my helmet, I had to go to A&E for a CT scan on my head to make sure I didn't have any small internal bleeds. Small bleeds which in a normal body would usually sort themselves out in no time but in someone on blood thinning juice, could potentially spiral out of control, especially whilst tent camping overnight in the company of a bunch of boy scouts.
Not surprisingly I didn't enjoy the day in A&E and I spent my time mentally kicking myself for being so stupidly competitive (racing a 12 year old boy) and forgetting that I'm supposed to be taking it easy (racing moderately *is* my idea of taking it easy).
I have been very busy at work since then... very busy. I have also been sleeping a lot - making up for poor nights sleep (because of the pain) by sleeping late and my body is recovering from the shock, fighting the infection that has flared up in my knee and making me sleep for a long time. As a consequence I've been finding it hard to get out on my bike. Even when I do have some time to go out, there's an emotional resistance, one which says, "best stay at home, you might crash and end up in A&E again". I don't like this.
On Tuesday I went to the gym to do weights and then got home and sat on the turbo for an hour and I made it out off road on Wednesday night with a great bunch of people from Sheffield Triathlon Club. They did my ego the power of good as I was helping them to learn some cyclo-cross techninques. I also rode very gingerley yet at times very bravely considering my condition - and I was considering it. It was always at the back of my mind as I bounced my skinny 'cross wheels down Rivelin Valley trails usually reserved for my mountain bike.
I haven't been out on my bike since. I do miss it but I am still tired and I admit to still being a little scared.
So yesterday I sat down and set myself some targets to achieve in between now and my major races this 'cross season and also next year's tri season. I hope these intermediary hits will help me progress and give me the excuse I need to stop working every day and go and get some exercise at a reasonable hour of day (so that I can sleep at night).
For now though, I am staring down the barrel of the 3 Peaks Cyclo-cross on (what feels like) very little appropriate training. It's over 3 months since Celtman and my diagnosis so that's my endurance in the can and with 2 weeks off because of my pedal car crash, I think my dad will be hauling me around by the bib shorts braces, not the other way around.
Dad's been training as only he knows how (long and steady) and I think he's a wonderful 65 year old. In fact, he's not allowed to be 65! Every week he listens to me whine about my condition. Every week he is resolutely confident about his ability to finish this year's race. At least I know where I get my optimism from.
So I am heading out this weekend to do two cyclo-crosses in two days. That is my contribution to endurance and fitness combined. Regardless of what motivational state of mind I am in, there is one thing that makes it easy to look forwards to next weekend and it's this...
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| (though I'm hoping there won't be any snow next weekend) |
